How To Mend A Broken Heart And Love Again

A broken heart cannot be healed in an instanst, because unfortunately our hearts aren't made of rubber or wood so we bounce back and learn to trust and love again.

We all wish that our hearts didn't feel so deeply and we didn't have to pick up the pieces after a break-up or feel that we are cracking from a cruel remark.

We carry our hearts more like a glass, easily breakable and fragile, and try to protect it at every cost.

Although it is natural for us to protect our feelings and avoid painful consequences, too much protection can act as a stiff armour, shielding us from change, growth and development.

It is only when you're able to feel your feelings, emotions and pains, that you finally find fulfillment in your life.

Most of us avoid pain and hurt like the plague. We try to immerse ourselves in all sorts of activities and even resort to substance abuse, anything we can do in order not to feel pain.

There are many defense strategies we use to inhibit us from being connected to our true feelings and needs.

Sometimes we use a blindfold and overlook the obvious to reduce feelings of pain and suffering. Rather than dealing with overwhelming, painful circumstances we act as though it never happened.

We are also good at rationalizing the wrong done to us and try to find logical excuses to cover up our disappointments or hurt feelings.

If we wish to become mature and fulfilled beings, it is important for us to face the pain and embrace it. Denial of truth can actually keep us back from getting forward in life.

Pain and suffering are an indication that you're alive. Protecting yourself from pain will stop you from knowing and understanding your deepest feelings.

When you stop denying how badly you wanted something you didn't get, you will connect with something else that is just as meaningful.

You have to be willing to tolerate the uncomfortable feelings of pain to get to the core problem of what is unsettling you.

Once we're conscious of the way the defence mechanisms work to block us from dealing with hurtful feelings, we can then start to deal with them in a healthy way.

When you hear yourself excusing or rationalizing an instance where you were hurt, take note of it and question yourself about the real truth behind it and ask yourself how have these reasons served you until now? What is the tough areas in your life that you don't want to face? What are the consequences for not facing them?

You may find that you've used them to move on from something without considering what you're losing.

Next, examine these excuses that you've been using to delude yourself. These excuses will start to sound like "I do actually care" or "I'm really upset about what happened". Thus, you can take action instead of walking away.

Learning to keep your heart open is a very hard process, but once you learn how to do it, you will be on your way to a more satisfying life.

To achieve this , stop ignoring how you feel. Allow yourself to become affected by what it is that is unsettling you, let the feelings of embarassment or fear point you to what needs to change.

Question why the situation or person is giving you these feelings and work on what positive steps can be made to experience an improved situation.

Listen to those around you. Whenever loved ones or acquaintances tell you more than twice of their concern for your attitudes or behaviors, then you have the power to address these issues, opening you up to a much better outcome.

Open up your heart to love and feelings of joy, for it is in our sufferings and pains that we discover our true self and our inner strength.

On this Valentine's Day, I wish joy, peace and happiness to everyone who has love in their life and wish those who are hurting or in pain a blessed healing of the heart and an inner joy that is achievable through facing truths and the act of loving ourselves.